Telling The Unpopular Truth


I found myself in a sticky situation for which I decided to take control of recently.  I’m tired of being the one holding the unpopular truth and being stifled by people who wear blinders in order to continue to believe the truth according to my Ex.

It’s a precarious position as I know I have drawn a line in the sand now for which I won’t likely recover friendship from his family.  But I have suffered in silence long enough.  Facts speak truth so I delivered facts which were met with silence.

As much as I feel for his family with the confusion, anger and resentment they now must feel for me, and the potential hurt that may be inflicted upon me for showing them the facts to his lies, I know what I have done.  I have severed all remaining ties and I have to remain at peace with the can of worms I’ve flung free.

It’s amazing how we dupe ourselves into believing what we want to believe and not seeing the truth even when it’s presented to us.  We want to believe what we think we want to know and nothing more.

Yes the good girl in me is waffling this afternoon, but the authentic 50 year old is standing strong within me as well.  I feel badly for having delivered the unpopular truth, but I felt like the circumstances were right for the revealing of his lies.

It’s difficult to co-parent with someone who doesn’t communicate and doesn’t take care of his own finances.  On many occasions I have told his mama that he needs help, that there’s something wrong with him because he isn’t happy, he isn’t acting responsibly, but she told me he was fine.  So I stopped.  He’s her son and not my husband anymore.

So I sit in silence, wondering what their silence means and knowing that the sickening feeling in my stomach isn’t going away any time soon unless I stand strong and get back  to the authentic 50 year old state of mind where I belong.

I wish they would understand that my intention to tell the unpopular truth was to get him help in the end.  Not to hurt them, but to help him.  But the herd won’t see it that way and I knew it in my heart.  Surely, I’m being blamed here, even though I was simply the messenger.  What’s that saying, shoot the messenger?







This entry was posted in 50 years old, divorce and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

10 Responses to Telling The Unpopular Truth

  1. TJ Fox says:

    You are only responsible for your own actions and reactions, everything else is on them. You have to do what is right for you and, in turn, what is right for your kids. You are the one that has to be able to look at yourself in the mirror everyday. If you can do that, then you are doing the right thing.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. You need to do what’s right for you and your family. Tj is right

    Liked by 2 people

  3. bone&silver says:

    It’s hard sometimes when we change, & no one else in the family wants to. But you’re right to stand up and hold your ground as a 50-yr old, and speak the truth, good on you

    Liked by 1 person

  4. MoJo says:

    They may or may not hear the truth, but you don’t have to hide it anymore. Stay strong gorgeous.


  5. Mischenko says:

    I’ve always been amazed at how people always believe what they want to believe, no matter what the truth. I feel for you, Janie, and you have to do what’s right for you. ❤ Hugs.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s