Sometimes You Just Need A Little Push

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I was invited out last night to meet a bunch of Moms that I was close with years ago when our kids were on the same sports team.  We were supposed to meet for drinks and apps at a place in town.  While I agreed to go for one drink, after the day I had yesterday (ups and downs), I wasn’t in the mood.

But then my friend Coco came to the rescue as she PUSHED me to go.  I mean pushed – as in WHY aren’t you going?  Why do you put yourself last?  Why can’t you go for one drink and leave because you have to get home to the kids?  Who said you can’t go?  YOU!  So, you can tell yourself you can go then!

I have to tell you I fought Coco with every excuse in the book.  And she took every one of my excuses and turned them around in a formidable way.  She wouldn’t take my no for an answer.  She was relentless.  And so I went…And it was good.

Sometimes, I’d rather hide in my cocoon at home than to make myself get dressed up to go out.  Since the separation and divorce, it’s more comfortable at home for me, but I’ve been home for a long time now.  Things aren’t changing for me sitting at home.  Here I was invited out, but was going to bail at the last minute because they’re all married and I’m not.  They knew my Ex and they go out all together with their husbands often as a group.  I felt like I was going to be uncomfortable because of that.  Funny how we get stuck in our own beliefs and limit ourselves, isn’t it?

It was a perfectly happy night reconnecting with these friends!  I’m so glad I didn’t miss out.  Sometimes we just need a friend to give us the extra push, don’t you think?  Thanks Coco!

So tonight, I’m pushing myself to go to dinner with a few girlfriends again.  These are a divorced, married and never married motley group of all different ages.  While I don’t know some of them well, there’s one that I do, so we are carpooling together.  I’m the driver, so I’ll have a wine at dinner only, but it should be fun.

Wow!  How’s that for a busy weekend says the girl who never goes out?  I’ve had a few other invites recently for the next month that I have agreed to, so I think the Universe is making me expand my horizons.  Friends from different times in my life are calling and texting to get together.  Maybe it’s time to break out of my shell and see the world again.

I’ll let you know how it goes!  Until then, I have to find something to wear!  You know how it is, don’t you? My dilemma is always what fits, what looks good, how dressed up to get and so on and so forth.  It should probably take me 3 outfits to try on before I find one that makes me feel good.  Such is the life of a 50 year old divorcée! LOL

 

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16 Responses to Sometimes You Just Need A Little Push

  1. SDC says:

    That sounds great. I know how this goes and usually it’s just my internal monologue keeping me from doing stuff. I try to be equal parts social butterfly and tentative recluse.

    Liked by 1 person

    • janieleeds says:

      Yes and that internal monologue has kept me captive for too long. I straddle that social butterfly and tentative recluse too. I used to be more social butterfly but after the divorce, recluse was more like it. Trying to expand my wings again to re-emerge as a butterfly.. Well, maybe not total social butterfly, but flying on my own again and getting used to the newness.

      Liked by 1 person

      • SDC says:

        Me too..when I was married I never said no to going anywhere or doing anything…it took me a while after that to realize i either needed a break, or that that just wasnt me to begin with. It burned me out. I like to think of this last two years as taking that break and figuring it out. Trying to find the balance. Good for you letting the monologue go for a bit! 🦋❤

        Like

      • janieleeds says:

        Thanks Sam. I was the same way when I was married! I loved going out and entertaining. I enjoyed it all. Then became a recluse when he left, even though people did reach out. I just stayed home. This is new territory. Out without a husband of over 20 years which was like a crutch, you know? Having someone with you to do things. Now I’m on my own. A little disconcerting really, but I can do this…I think I can…I think I can…I know I can…I just have to TRY! ♥

        Liked by 1 person

      • SDC says:

        Yes you can!!! Me and my daughters mom were side by side for about 18 years so…I get it. It’s a totally different thing when that changes!

        Like

      • janieleeds says:

        Yes it is…but I’m trying to get more comfortable with it now. We’ll see…all part of the journey, right?

        Liked by 1 person

      • SDC says:

        Absolutely.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Create Space says:

    Janie it must be very difficult, at least I can imagine how vulnerable I would feel after years and years as a couple but I’m delighted to hear of your good experience and feel it is only the beginning of good things to come for you, as you discover new dimensions of yourself! Have fun, laugh, enjoy!

    Like

  3. Yay so pleased your stepping back into the land of the living, I’m sure you will look beautiful in whatever you wearing 😊 enjoy

    Like

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