Ok, I’ve got to be honest here. Today, on Day 7, I slipped and had one. It didn’t even taste good and I have guilt over it. At any point while I was smoking, I could have stopped, but I didn’t. I don’t know why I didn’t stop because I didn’t even enjoy it. And DARN, I made it almost a full week before succumbing. I made it through the whining voice and there wasn’t even any whining voice when I chose to do it. It was just anxiety and a lot of sad feelings that made me step outside.
I hate that this happened. I’ve been beating myself up over it for the last hour and so I thought I’d rather just say it and be done. Move on. Take the guilt and maybe not being perfect will help someone else who is struggling.
Because it’s an addiction and it’s hard to beat, but I am determined. My emotions have been all over the place today for really no reason except maybe just the stress of quitting. Who knows. But what’s the protocol here? Do I have to start over with Day One again? What’s the consensus?
Anyway, thanks for reading. Sorry to disappoint myself, my kids (although maybe they won’t find out) and my friends here. At least it was only one slip up and now that I have such a yucky taste in my mouth, hopefully I’ll remember that and not slip up again.