A friend came over the other night. She wanted me to help her set up her profile on that Match dating site because I’m a little more computer savvy than she is. So what the heck? Sure, I’ll help you. It ended up being a fun night. We had some wine, some Chinese food and we set her up on Match.
She’s a little older than I am, engaged once, broke it off in her twenties and has been dating on and off since then but with no long term success. She’s been online dating for a few years so she’s got way more experience than I do.
But I was dumbstruck as she shared some of her experiences. I have to admit that I was a little intrigued with the whole thing, but also very wary. I’m not sure if I have tough enough skin to look for love online. While some of her stories amused me, others made me sad and angry and even afraid.
At one point, we were talking about how it was so much easier when we were in our twenties to date. I sound like an old geezer, don’t I? Back in my day, blah blah blah. Ha! But seriously, I think it was easier when we were younger because back then, we were all on a level playing field. There wasn’t social media so you met people in person, through friends, at college or at work. We partied more back then because we didn’t have kids to take care of or more adult responsibilities. We were more carefree and for me, I thought the world was my oyster. And I really enjoyed myself.
Now however, life is really different – or is it? Sure I could still go out to bars, but I’m 50ish and most of my friends are married so we don’t do that sort of thing. Occasionally we will have a girls night out, but it’s dinner at a restaurant, a glass of wine and back home to take care of the kids. There’s no dancing or clubbing because we’d be laughed out of there.
So what’s a girl to do?
Once I accepted I was divorced and would be free to find love again (fingers crossed), I felt as if a past love and I would reconnect. And as you can see here, that did happen a little bit. But one’s faraway and the other’s married (and I have no desire to involve myself with him, especially because he’s married), so I am waiting to see if the end of May brings another one from my past. But I’m not so sure I’d even want any of them anyway.
I’m ok to be on my own for a bit longer. I like my own company and my freedom. But it would be nice if a friend of a friend would introduce me to someone special. I’ve let friends know I am ready to venture out, but nothing has come of it so far.
Thanks for reading and letting me chat with you. I feel like there are many of us out there who are looking for a connection and not a one night stand.