I have had enough with my kids and their anger towards my former husband, their father. While neither will confront him with the laundry list of complaints they have about him, I am getting the brunt of their frustration and anger. And I’m done with it. Thank goodness they were away for almost a day with him so that I could breathe and channel inner peace before the barrage begins again when they return tonight.
I’ve suggested therapy to both of them before, but now I think I’m going to demand that they go. Their venting is making me crazy because I am tired of staying quiet. I think a group session is in order and I know just the therapist to book.
Often, I don’t say what I really want to about their dad because I’m trying to be respectful and allow them to have their own relationship with him without my interference. By the way, their relationship is crumbling on its own, no thanks to me because he’s doing it all on his own. But still. I’ve had enough of feeling like a punching bag to their anger about him. It was the last straw yesterday when I found out he did some sneaky financial stuff that one of the kids told me offhandedly (not realizing what it really meant).
I can’t take it. I’m livid. And I don’t want to alienate my kids who are suffering because they need to vent and I need information. I’m just happy that they left the house for a day so that I could kick back and just rest in peace without the stinky anger.
I want to tell them what I think of him without restraint. I would love to blurt out all the bullshit that I’ve been dealing with quietly over the years. I would love to open their eyes to what he’s doing to them with his narcissism and how they aren’t crazy, it’s just his manipulation (and he’s a professional). But I can’t because they’re hurting. But maybe a therapist can help them to see what I am not comfortable revealing because I fear they will repeat it to him in a fit of anger that Mom said blah blah blah and he’ll lose his mind and make things even harder than they already are. I mean, if you know a narcissist, you know they don’t handle failure or blame well. They strike out with vengeance. And he’s shown plenty of that over the years in not so subtle ways. And that’s the last thing I need is for him to feel vindicated in hurting me and the kids.
Back to the drawing board…Thanks for reading.