– The Buddha
I saw this quote today and felt like kicking myself. Not literally kicking myself mind you, but figuratively because I’m tired of suffering. I was attached, attached to the past for so long and I suffered as you may have suffered too. We twist and mold and review in hindsight all that we had in our relationship that is not any longer and we bring that suffering onto ourselves. We long for those good times (not the bad ones) and we try to figure out what went wrong. We try to find whose fault it was and God forbid we deem it to be our own. And if we’re empaths, we certainly blame ourselves.
That’s when the suffering begins in earnest and like a dog with a bone, we punish ourselves, looking for redemption. Or maybe it’s just me who did that. Maybe I’m the only fool who blamed myself because with narcissistic abuse, we are groomed to believe that we are to make our spouse happy and if we fall short, then we are to blame.
Don’t fall into that trap dear friends. Don’t suffer needlessly by the attachment. Let go of what once was and you will let go of the suffering. I have found that the simpler the message, the harder the lesson, but it helps to keep it simple. That way, the confusion is less.
So if you’re suffering, stop looking back. Stop wishing for a different outcome. Turn the page. Change the channel. Become more about you and your healing. You have strength that you’ve never realized before. You’ve already come a long way baby. Keep going!