We’re coming down to the last few days before the kids go to college. I have been decidedly absent from nagging. I have written a list of what needs to be packed. I have gently reminded them of last minute items they need, but I have been ignored. And so, I am not nagging. I remind them once in the morning and offer to help them, but nobody takes me up on it. So I am going about my own business in my own time. Not in a bratty way, but in a peaceful one. After all, they will be at college without my nagging soon enough and will have to be responsible for everything in their lives with only me as a helpful phone call away.
You’d think that because I offered to help with packing, cleaning their rooms etc., that they would jump at the opportunity. But nope. They ignore it. I have let them know that I will not be packing in the wee hours of the morning the night before they go to college. Nor will I be footing the bill for items shipped last minute overnight costing more than I would have paid because they realize at the last second they need x, y or z.
I would imagine that at some point one of them would realize their soon to be dilemma, but so far, they are oblivious. I don’t want them to leave with us fighting, but I’m not willing to beg them to do what they have to do. And so I sit here festering and annoyed.
It’s just part of dirtying the nest I suppose, but it’s making me crazy. As I wrote this yesterday, I simmered down and let go of it all. Instead, I just allowed myself to enjoy them. What will be packed, will be packed. What they will be missing once they move into their dorm rooms will be remedied when it can be. Perhaps that’s what learning is all about!
So if you’re in a similar situation, don’t worry. Whatever doesn’t get done, simply doesn’t get done. It won’t be you living without clean undies or wearing the same shorts for days at a time. Even though you want what’s best for your kid, at some point, the apron strings need to be cut and they need to learn to fly on their own. Don’t worry, they’ll be calling you for help because believe me, they know you’ll be there when they need you. That’s who a good parent is – one who lets go and yet holds on loosely, ready with support and love when needed.