You Can’t Bully Me Anymore

Ex-wife of a narcissist.  Primary full custody of kids.  Ex husband ignores everyone and everything.  Rules do not apply to him.  And yet, he still thinks that what he demands is to be obeyed by me.  Um…No.

You can’t bully me anymore.

Suddenly he wants information from me.  He even called me, but didn’t leave a message.  He probably doesn’t want his voice on tape.  Sorry, I only respond to messages.  I don’t respond to missed calls.  Sometimes people need a dose of their own medicine, although I do know that this is un-chartered territory for me and he will somehow in his head make me pay for my insolence in not answering him.

I do get that hiccup of dread when I think about it.  Yes, I still do because I’m not fully healed from him I guess.  I can be triggered emotionally, but I’ve learned to reach out to a trusted  friend who understands before taking any action.

It’s a process, but I’m standing up for myself.  Yay Janie!

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22 Responses to You Can’t Bully Me Anymore

  1. TJ Fox says:

    Good for you! Baby steps, bu they are always steps forward.


  2. gwennym says:

    you’re killin’ it …….. little steps


  3. SO proud of you! And aren’t they all still playing the same script!!! I too get these calls, mine are from “Private Caller” and I know who it is, even pick up now and say “Hello, how ARE you doing” and he hangs up. No more dread, no more fear. No more control. The light will transform the dark. If he’s too ashamed to speak, he made the life choices that brought the shame, and he needs more help than I can give. But I still do have compassion, dammit!!! Take care of yourself, good friend!


  4. Elizabeth says:

    he is really a bully, but as i say to my kids: they are bullies because they aren’t happy, so let them be, don’t take them seriously, one day they will get tired and let go of you. hugs to you!


  5. LA says:



  6. This is inspiring, YOU are inspiring. Stay strong. You’ve got this. It’s their goal to keep you answering to them. You are overcoming it everyday.♥️♥️


  7. Sandy says:

    Good for you!


  8. It takes time. However I don’t think any of us can afford to let down our guard where narcissists are concerned.


  9. Mine tried to just tell me what was going to happen. I remember more than one tense stand off with him outside our house. Fortunately he already had an intervention order against him at that time, so he had backed off eventually. He made three attempts to get me to sign the house over to him in one day. He had emailed me first then had passed paperwork on via the children. He could never believe it, if what he wanted didn’t just happen.


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