If he wanted to come back, would you take your Ex back?
It’s a loaded question for sure. I think it depends on you, on him and on the unique circumstances that surround your break up. But I see so many women in a quandary about this subject that I thought I’d put it out there.
My ex left and while I did ask him to go to couples counseling, I never asked him to stay. I thought, if you want to leave, go. I won’t beg you to stay. As heartbroken as I was, I wouldn’t want anyone who didn’t want to be with me, to be a husband and a father, to stay. And he’s never asked to come back. And I don’t want him back.
Maybe that’s easier for me because he’s never given any hint of wanting to come back. So I had to move on. There was none of this push pull, dropping out of nowhere to try to reconnect, only to ghost later on. It wasn’t a clean break by any means, but cleaner than the stories I’ve heard. And I’m relieved because I think when they do that (hoovering), it’s heartbreaking. It reopens the wounds that were starting to heal. And it makes it all the more devastating if they vanish again and don’t follow through with reconnecting.
Moving on is tougher than it looks. I had to mend my broken heart and I cried a lot of tears for that decades’ long chapter in my life. I was on my own as a single mom with no back up. I had to learn how to make my life and my kids’ lives better with what little I had. I had to release him and me from our bond. But I did it.
My life isn’t perfect, but I can breathe now. I never realized how much I was holding my breath when he was around and walking on eggshells to make everything perfect all the time. I don’t miss that part of my past at all! I miss the companionship of a partner, but that’s where time plays tricks on our minds. In the end, he was a stranger and not a partner. Yes, I loved him, but I loved what we had years before and not what we had before he left. When I’m true to myself, I can remember how estranged we’d become and that wasn’t healthy. And I want to be healthy and whole. Don’t you?
So, what are you thinking? Would you take your ex back? Did you take him/her back? How did it go?