Do you remember when you first went off to college and there was an unlimited assortment of goodies to munch on in the cafeteria and no parental supervision? Nobody to say, “Eat your veggies,” or “You can’t have ice cream for dinner!” And in that year, everyone talked about gaining the Freshman 10 or Freshman 15 (meaning pounds)!
Well, sadly I’ll admit, I’ve got a similar issue with the Covid 10 (aka I’ve gained 10 lbs.) from being home with a stash full of non-nutritional snacks to munch on out of boredom, mindless habit and binge-watching many Netflix series that I probably wouldn’t have spent hours watching otherwise if we weren’t in a pandemic.
I threw self-discipline right out into the big road and let the trucks roll on over it. And I’m not proud of it. Nope. I feel ashamed. Bloated. Tired. Messy. This is not how my mother taught me. She was militant in the whole idea of Dress For Success.
And while I can justify that nobody really sees me but the kids and the occasional people at the local grocery, this is not like me at all. I’m not slovenly, but yoga pants have been my go to uniform for months and months. Yuck. So not me. I was always the girl who liked to be dressed, made up and coiffed before going out for any errand. I was dressed nicely throughout the marriage when my then husband came home. I prided myself on looking nice for him when he got home from work. Not in a Stepford Wife way, but just for myself, for him, for us.
This morning I got up and thought “I need to start dressing more for me. Even if nobody sees me but the kids and the local grocery people. Who cares? Why not make an effort even thought there’s no dating, nobody knocking on my door etc. Because if I can get back into the habit that I have had for decades prior to Covid, then I’ll feel better.”
But it’s an effort and it feels herculean. And there’s a piece of me that thinks, “What the hell, wait until this all blows over and spring arrives.”
Is anyone else feeling this way?