Going To The Chapel

My neighbors are getting married today. It will be the first wedding I’ve attended in years, let alone as a divorced woman. Interestingly, it will be his 3rd and her 2nd (or maybe her 3rd as well – I’m not willing to ask that) as she has 3 kids from 2 different relationships before the upcoming nuptials. Not that I’m counting in a bad way. But I’m hoping 3rd time’s a charm because they both deserve happiness!

I find it inspiring that they’ve found each other. It brings me hope that maybe someday I can as well. Find someone I mean. Because, hey, you never know…

So I bought a new dress to go to the wedding. It’s blue so I figured I’d have something new and something blue on for luck…LOL I know I’m being silly. I even found an Essie polish in the cabinet which looks a little like periwinkle blue – it’s called As If – so I painted my toes. I figured it was a good omen that the color is called that because I’m going to attend as if I feel great about myself – you know – fake it till you make it? Or maybe face it till you make it?

But unfortunately I didn’t sleep well last night. The older kid went out with unreliable friends from college and didn’t answer texts nor calls so I was pretty sleepless wondering where the heck he was. Turns out he went to sleep at a friend’s house, but never told me. While we haven’t had ‘the talk’ today because I don’t feel like dealing with it right now, we will after I get home from the wedding. He did apologize, but there’s more to be said from me. I don’t need sleepless nights especially when I wanted to look my best today and that’s not really happening.

And yes, I could have fallen asleep and just trusted that he was fine. I know that. But once my brain began its worrying, it was hard to stop it for awhile. He hasn’t done this in a long time so let’s hope it’s a fluke because he won’t be living here much longer if this happens again. He can find his own place, keep his own hours and grow up.

I’ll let you know how the wedding goes…at least there’s something fun and different going on today in my life! I hope all of you have a great Sunday filled with fun too!

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10 Responses to Going To The Chapel

  1. TJ Fox says:

    The lack of call would have been the spark for a rather ugly argument in my house. And yes, it would have had that piece to it that said that you are more than welcome to that behavior under your own roof. It is about respecting the other people you live with. I think the rules will always be slightly different when you live with a parent rather than a roommate or friend. The parent will naturally have more invested in what happens to you. Not communicating basic things like whether or not you will be home is a big one. I hope you were able to have a good talk with him and get this resolved.

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  2. Beth W. says:

    I hope you had fun at the wedding! It is tough sometimes because even though you are very happy for the couple, it is difficult not to wonder if there will ever be happiness like that in your life again. (Putting myself in the scenario, not you 😉 My niece got married in December while I was in the midst of my ex playing mind games with me. They are such a cute couple and the wedding was wonderful, but It was difficult not to throw myself a pity party and berate myself for choosing so poorly for myself.

    I totally understand the fine line with adult children. Sometimes they just honestly don’t think, but it is always good to take a bit of time before “laying down the law”. I’m glad you were able to find resolution to the situation.

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    • janieleeds says:

      Thank you Beth! Yes, I forgot to write about a follow up about the wedding. It was lovely, but I felt like a third wheel so I was glad that I didn’t stay for the small reception as I heard it went on for hours! But it was nice to dress up again. And think about how I’d feel if I ever found someone to walk the aisle with again. I’d never say never, but for now, I’m in no hurry. LOL I’m sorry your ex was playing mind games. That’s not fun at all nor is it helpful to you.

      Thank you for your support. Yes, kids and I are ok again. It’s a learning curve apparently that we both time to adjust to slowly. 🙂

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      • Beth W. says:

        I think I would have skipped the reception as well. It is nice to see people find happiness again, though. I am with you as far as walking down the aisle again. I want affection and companionship, just think that it will take me quite a while to get to the point of taking that leap again. As you said, though, never say never 🙂
        Grown kids are definitely challenging at times. It seems like with mine, my daughter especially and my oldest son who (thank goodness) has his own place, we can be the best of friends one moment and completely at odds the next. I think sometimes they just need to flex their wings and assert their independence. I am glad to have them all close, though. I know I’ll miss my daughter when she heads back to school in August.

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      • janieleeds says:

        I get it Beth. When we were going through the divorce the older one went off to college. I couldn’t understand why we couldn’t get along. Then when the younger one left, someone told me about the phrase DIRTY THE NEST and I wrote about it (sorry I don’t know how to insert link) but it made sense to me. Perhaps that applies in a certain way to your independent son?
        I don’t discount remarrying, but it will take time and have to be worth it for me (and him). Who knows – time will tell for us both! 🙂
        I know you’ll miss your daughter when she goes off to school. You’ll be an empty nester, right?

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      • Beth W. says:

        Not quite, Janie. I was last year but in April my middle son (26) moved back in since I have more house than I need. My oldest son (28) bought my old house when I bought this one from my Dad. My daughter (19) is the one that is just home ’till school starts again. 😊. I will have to find your older post, but I think I know what you’re talking about. It is easier to spread their wings and fly if they aren’t so tightly connected to the nest 😄 My oldest has always been a bit contrary, though. 🤣

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      • janieleeds says:

        We all have that one that can be more contrary, but I always try to think of that one as my teacher (and vice versa). 🙂 LOL
        Enjoy your kids Beth! They are lucky to have you as a Mom! 🙂

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      • Beth W. says:

        That is an excellent way of looking at it! I need to remember that during those challenging moments. 🤣. Your kiddos are very lucky to have you too! ❤

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      • janieleeds says:

        Thank you! 💗 Yours are too!

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