Pass The Salt

My kids told their dad and his family about my upcoming surgery because they wanted support. While I didn’t really want the narcissists to know, it was important to the kids so that they don’t have to be bullied and that there’s some type of understanding when the kids can’t do something because they’d have to be taking care of the puppy or me after surgery. Because the narcissists don’t take no for an answer.

So they told them Saturday night. But it didn’t turn out like they thought it would. It was as if the kids had said, ‘pass the salt’ instead of ‘mom is having open heart surgery and we’re scared’ which was how/what they had said, but the response was nothing. Nobody in the ex’s family even raised an eyebrow or asked anything.

We were all startled by the response. The kids expected them to say they’d be there for them when needed (which wasn’t said), even though I can’t believe they wouldn’t be. And for me, well, I’ll admit, I thought they would be kinder towards the kids. Forget about me, I didn’t expect anyone to check in on me. Why would they? I’m sure the ex and his evil mother are hoping that I croak so he doesn’t have to pay alimony any longer. And yes, I’m that serious. I wouldn’t put it past them to now be excited that something could go wrong. Because that’s how they are.

I tried to reassure the kids that they would be supported by my side of the family and their dad’s even though they didn’t say anything. I can’t imagine the ex-MIL wouldn’t be thrilled to tell everyone how she was burdened into taking care of my kids while I left them alone (not saying I was in the hospital – because yes, she twists everything possible) and how she’s such an amazing grandma. Pardon me while I gag…and yes she’s done this before…in different ways…and I found out from the people she told whom she didn’t know I was friends with at the time. And yes I did set them straight with the truth, not her twisted version of it.

Additionally that ex-MIL bought flowers for my kids to give their dad’s girlfriend (of not even 9 months) to celebrate her on Mother’s Day. I don’t understand…wouldn’t that be their dad’s job to do that instead of his mother’s? And why? The kids hardly know her and she’s certainly not their mom. That one hit me squarely in the heart.

I guess I’m oversensitive these days. I can’t help it. Unfortunately I ended up feeling exhausted yesterday so we couldn’t go out to dinner like I’d planned. Luckily we got take out, but I’m more and more exhausted over little things these days which isn’t good. The specialist had said it might happen. I guess it is…so better that I get this surgery sooner rather than later…

I hope you had a great Mother’s Day…thanks for being so kind to me!

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10 Responses to Pass The Salt

  1. scr4pl80 says:

    Hugs to you. You know karma…

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  2. E.A. Wickham says:

    I’m sorry with everything you’re going through health wise that you have the awful ex family to deal with.

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  3. Beth W. says:

    Oh my, Janie, one would think that the ex and his family could have at least put on a show of concern for the kids. They apparently can’t even be bothered to do that. How sad. 😦 And the ex-MIL buying flowers for the girlfriend????? Total craziness…..and how awkward for the kids. I’m so sorry you were feeling wiped out yesterday and not up to dinner out. I’m sure besides being physically exhausted, the coldness towards you that the ex and family are displaying to your kids is draining emotionally as well. Do you have the surgery scheduled now? Sending positive thoughts and prayers that the surgery is a total success and that you see an immediate improvement. ❤

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    • janieleeds says:

      Thank you Beth…it’s in the process of being scheduled, but the coordination between the specialists (and a few blips) have gotten in the way so I’m waiting for a final date. I hope you had a great Mother’s Day at your house – that you were celebrated and shown how much you are loved and appreciated! 💕

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  4. Ainsobriety says:

    Mother’s Day is bullshit and I hate it.
    Lol. Sorry. It’s way too triggery.

    I forget, how old is your youngest?

    Honestly, focus on you. If someone else ever needed to step up you wouldn’t know about it anyway. They can figure it out.

    Hugs and love to you
    Anne

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    • janieleeds says:

      Hi Anne! Youngest is 22, older will be 24 this year. I’m taking your advice and focusing on me. They’ll figure it out or won’t…little by little they’re growing up. Hugs and love back to you Anne….thank you for being you!

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  5. Dwight Hyde says:

    Checking on you, Janie. How are you doing? Sending hugs and love from Colorado🤗❤️

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